>Gallstones & Pepe Le Peu

23 Feb

>This is quite a leap. From bunnies to surgery and skunks — but isn’t that just the type of twist life deals us? And here I am, writing from the posh comfort and stink-free environs of Boulder’s St. Julien Hotel.

THE STORY:
Just to be EXTRA dramatic — I had an attack on Tuesday night. It mirrored the first one on Christmas Day. Dull-ish back pain leading me to a full blown stretching routine. (It had to be the hours put in at the computer!) Didn’t work. Then, it moved to the front and felt like really bad heartburn — so a round of Tums to no avail. Then I was incapacitated for the next three or four hours by intense pain capped off by a couple of kneeling meditation sessions at the porcelain throne. Finally falling asleep around 4 a.m. Sounds like a picnic, eh? And me with my freshly formed phobia of anything medical. (Induced by the very recent 2nd c-section, no doubt.)

So after spending as much of Wednesday resting as possible, I was SO ready to go to bed. And did. Then about five minutes later, the dog comes running into the bedroom and sounds like she is puking. Ironic. Then the hubby lets loose an amazingly long and loud stream of profanities. I’m thinking, “Wow. Must have been A LOT of puke.” That’s about when the smell hit. OH-MY-GOD-SKUNK. I sprang from the bed and raced from the room. Unfortunately, the whole house already reeked. Windows were thrown open. Fans turned on. Febreze sprayed prolifically. Dog doused in SKUNK OFF purchased three years ago the first time it happened. (No lessons learned here!) Anything to make it STOP. Dog — poor thing — was banished to the garage. It was too late to do much besides cover our faces with the sheet and go to bed. The smell woke me up all through the night. And the kiddos slept through it all.

Yesterday we did everything we could to get out of the house. It’s entirely possible that the stench actually drove me to see the doctor. That smell is a powerful force.

Off to the internist I went, feeling completely nervous and worried and stinky. And the doctor came right into the exam room glancing around and toward the window before she said, “Do you smell a skunk?” Seriously. “Ah, that would be me.” And they wondered why my blood pressure was sky high.

The exam proceeded anyway and everything I had read on the web was real. Yes, it does sound like gallstones. (Mima and Mom were right!) Yes, the only treatment is surgery. We’ll need to do some tests.

Ultrasound scheduled and I take my Pepe Le Peu self on home. It was during the walk to the groomers — with the dog on a LONG leash — that we decided a hotel stay was in order. I mean, even the clothes in our dresser stunk!

So we loaded up the trunk and moved to rev-er-y. Swimming pools and room service.

Miss Six says, “I think we should just live here.” Yea. That’s my girl.

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One Response to “>Gallstones & Pepe Le Peu”

  1. Bay Street Rehab February 25, 2007 at 7:05 pm #

    >OH my god Cassy! This is hysterical – in a disturbing sort of way.Poor Ruby. 😦

    Like

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